The following is from
A Bootstrap Thanksgiving:
Janet was a bit surprised when the trio of teenage boys came up to her with a wild plan. It
started with wanting to do something other than cook the usual turkey in the
usual way. Not that she didn't do multiple animals on Thanksgiving, it was just
they wanted something different.
She wasn't surprised, she heard it every year
from someone. Usually they had an idea but didn't want to put their money where
their mouth was. She was only a little defensive about the whole project.
"You are saying you are going to do
this. You lot," she said. The boys looked at each other.
"Well, yeah, if that's what it
takes," Tucker Chambers, the apparently leader said.
"And you want to do... what? Spit roast
a carcass or two your way?" she demanded.
"Um, no. We heard some things about
frying birds. And we want to scale it up," Tucker said. He looked to his
two friends but both just nodded. No help there. "We want to fry a
dinosaur," he said, plunging into the idea full steam. In for a penny in
for a pound as his mother occasionally said.
Janet stared at him. "Fried? Are you
serious? Fried?" she demanded,
aghast at what Tucker was proposing. She looked from 1 male to the other 2. All
3 teens grinned at her and nodded enthusiastically.
Spare
me, she thought in annoyance.
"Yes fried." Tucker answered.
"It was a big thing back in the states, or so mom and dad said. It is some
of the best bird you've ever tasted. We want to do it."
"Yeah, except your mom will complain
about clanging arteries!" Alejandro snorted. Alejandro Cortez was the
third in their trio and the best mechanic of the group.
"It's one meal! We're not talking about
making it a weekly thing," Tucker said.
Like
that could happen, Janet thought with a
mental snort.
"True."
"Ho boy though, that's a lot of
oil!" -Noah said, whistling at the logistics as they began to sink in. He
was good at logistics but he preferred hunting or engineering. "Finding a
pot big enough...we'd probably have to make one. And the burners..." he
shook his head but he could the list forming in his mind and realized they were
on top of the challenge.
"Oil hell, we'll need a crane to get the
bloody thing in and out," Janet said with a shake of her head. "No
way you are doing this indoors."
"We've got snow coming in at any time
during that month," Noah pointed out, dismayed at the idea of doing the
project outside.
"Then you better think of something. You
want to use flamable oil remember? That's not something you play with indoors
in that sort of quantity. Not if you don't want to burn the entire base
down."
"Oh," Noah said, making a face as
realization dawned that flaming oil indoors in that quantity wasn't a good idea.
"Point," he said, relenting.
"Are you serious? We'd freeze our nuts
off!" Alejandro protested.
"Better bundle up," Janet said,
grinning maliciously. He turned and opened his mouth to her but she shook a
wooden spoon at him. "And before you say it, no. This is your bright ass
idea, your project. You figure it out. I'm going to be busy ruling the kitchen
and dealing with everything else."
"Oh frack," the mechanic muttered.
"We're so screwed," he said, shooting a look at Tucker.
"The only way we'd need a crane is if we
did something really big. Like say, a T-rex and we're not doing that,"
Tucker said with a shake of his head.
"Ah..."
"No. First, there is no breast meat.
Mostly dark meat," Tucker said. He'd done his homework in that regard.
"Yeah, but think of the
drumbsticks!" Alejandro said, rubbing his hands together and smacking his
lips for emphasis.
Janet snorted, envisioning a Flintstones
cartoon moment.
"Yeah, and my answer is still no. I
think we need to try this small and scale up," Tucker said. "We've
done that before."
"Point," Noah said, piling on.
"We don't even know what it'll taste like."
"True. Turkey was all breast. We need to
find a dino that has a lot of breast," Tucker agreed.
"Therapod obviously. But..."
Alejandro wrinkled his nose in thought.
"It's like he's looking through a mental
cook's catalog," Noah chuckled.
"Maybe. This might catch on if we do it
right," Tucker said, cocking his head. Small businesses had begun to start
up in the communities.
"What, Kentucky Fried Dino?" Noah
asked with a laugh.
"If it works, why not? It worked for the
Flintstones didn't it?" Janet said with a grin.
"Um... Flintstones?"
The boys asked, turning to her in confusion.
"Fictional cave men," she
explained, immediately regretting the reference since she had dated herself.
"Okay, if you say so," Alejandro
said dubiously.
"God I feel old. Okay, so are you really
going to do this...?" Janet asked.
"Yeah," Tucker said, still a bit
eager. He looked to his friends. Their enthusiasm had been dampered a bit as
reality of the project had started to kick in but they seemed game. Especially
since they were expected to do it.
It meant they could prove themselves. They
turned to each other and started to list what they'd need.
"Ahem before you boys get too far ahead
of yourselves..."Janet said.
"Yes?"
"Speaking of scaling up, you can cut up
the large dino carcass and fry the parts individually,"she suggested. The
boys blinked. Janet scowled, fighting the urge to roll her eyes. "I know,
I know. You want the whole bird. Dino, bird, whatever. You can always
reassemble on the other side, geesh! This way you can fry the parts right. Some
meat cooks faster than others."
Tucker turned to the other boys. "She
has a point."
"She is the expert," Noah agreed
with a nod.
"Thanks," she said dryly. She
didn't mention any ideas like breading or anything like that. Let them figure
it out.
Air frying might be the better route but she
decided to let them learn on their own.
"Okay. Let's see if we can do
this."
"If we do this, and big if, you boys cook it, safety first, but
you also get to clean up after it. No
playing the usual cook and then leave the real work to others. You are in it
from beginning to end, and I do mean
end," Janet said, shaking her spoon at them for emphasis.
That took a little bit of the fun out of it.
The teens looked at each other and then shrugged.
"We need to round up the oil first. And
a pot, and the means to heat it," Noah said.
"True. I don't suppose the veggie oil
we're producing for the vehicles will work?" Alejandro asked.
Noah made a face. He knew chemistry a lot
better than Alejandro did. "It's rough. We filter it but not for food
applications. Let me look into that," he said.
Tucker nodded. "Good. I'll go over the
dinos. Therapods obviously as you said," he said. "With as much
breast meat as we can get. Huh... I wish the memes hadn't locked their
genes."
"What? Why?"
"Breeding," Janet answered for
Tucker. The young man nodded. "If we could breed them we'd selectively
breed for animals that had big breasts."
"What is it with men and breast
fetishes?" Aimee Fenn demanded, coming into the conversation midway
through.
"It's not... oh never mind. I'll fill
you in later," Tucker said testily as the young men grinned and chuckled.
"Boys!" she said, poking
the nearest into mock cringing away from her. "Oh will you lot quit!"
she sighed in exasperation as Janet ushered them out.
"Go check with your dad and get final
permission from him," Janet urged. Tucker nodded.
"For what? Oh, never mind, I just wanted
to let you three know class got canceled for the afternoon," Aimee said.
"We have to work on that project though, it's due next week."
"Later. We've got another one to work on
now," Noah said firmly.
"Right. Shall we see my dad?"
Tucker asked.
"Now?"
"No time like the present," Tucker
said with a shrug.
"What if he's busy?"
"He always is. But he makes time for
family," Tucker said with a wave good bye to Janet and Aimee. "Later
ladies," he said as he led his buddies off.
(((^)))
