Winds of Change Snippet 7

 Last one. This is the most popular parody story. The Betas and Rea loved it. I had fun writing it.

*M*A*S*H*

 PG7-167 Uijeongbu, Pi sector

 

The colony had a single S-shaped main continent with a series of islands around it. The main continent was connected to a northern wasteland, which was mostly steppes and tundra.

Initially, the colony had been a multispecies affair; that was up until the pirate plagues had hit. The population had been decimated.

There had been no central government. Two competing governments had been formed to fill the vacuum when Federation ships began to ply the jump line more frequently.

The government of the north was a military dictatorship that did not want the Federation there. The south was a democratic republic and did want the Federation’s presence. They wanted membership into the Federation. It opened them up to issues with legality since there was no central government. Legally the planet could not apply for membership until they had a central democratically elected government.

The agrarian star system was six jumps from the main north to south jump line in Pi sector. The first three jumps were through destroyed hyperbridge star systems so it was no surprise that regular traffic didn’t go into the region often. The jump line had only six inhabited star systems left in it. Four of those were purely agrarian colonies.

The branch jump line was twelve jumps from the recently conquered and repurposed Dante's Playground pirate base and eleven jump points from PR52-190, which was the doorway to the Omicron sector. There were a series of space colonies along the main north to south route that were prime potential customers for agrarian worlds to supply food and materials to.

Once the navy had cleared the branch of pirate activity, they had largely left it alone. The Federation State Department had sent in envoys with the hospital ship several years ago to make the rounds to each of the inhabited worlds in order to encourage them to rejoin the Federation.

The envoy to Uijeongbu had found that the colony world had broken out into a civil war. The north wanted nothing to do with the Federation, while the south did. The north was busy attempting to conquer the south, which was made up of primarily farmers in the central part of the country and peaceful city and fishing folk along the coastline to the south.

Legally the Federation couldn’t intervene other than to end the violence and send humanitarian aid. A battalion of Peacekeepers, a platoon of Army Engineers, and a single MASH unit the 4077 were sent in by troop transport with a cruiser escort.

The colony lacked an ansible.

Unfortunately, the cruiser was drawn away from the planet by ghost signs. The branch was supposed to be cleared of pirates, but the possibility of one lurking was too much to ignore. The ship haunted the outer edge of the star system, attempting to hunt the ghost signals down.

With the cruiser in the outer star system, there was no possibility of orbital strikes, and orbital monitoring was limited to the dozen satellites in orbit.

The northerners refused access to the Federation and wanted them to leave. The southerners invited them in. Initially the Federation just landed forces to perform humanitarian aid; however, when the northern army attacked Peacekeepers, Colonel Yangongo authorized a fire if fired upon ROE. The Federation people began to openly support the southerners.

*M*A*S*H*

First Lieutenant Kelani Nakahara came up to Captain Ben “Hawkeye” Pierce and showed him the X-ray results. He scanned them with a practiced eye and then nodded. “So, he’s got a couple buckets of scrap metal in his side and gut. Typical,” the surgeon sniffed as he looked down at the patient. “Don’t worry, kid, we’ll get you fixed right up,” he said.

The kid in question was a teenage soldier barely conscious.

“Get me another bag of plasma and a tub of surgical glue. I think I can get all of it,” the doctor said as he turned to the waiting tray.

“Hurry up, Pierce, we’ve got a line outside,” Lieutenant Colonel Henry Blade scolded.

“Coming, mother,” Hawkeye said with a simpering mocking voice. “Now this won’t hurt me a bit,” he said with a grin in his voice. “Put him under,” he said to the anesthesiologist.

The medic behind the head of the patient nodded and adjusted the gases and then put the mask over the patient’s face. The patient’s eyes closed, and he began to breath slower.

“He’s under,” the medic stated.

“Good. Now for some fun,” Hawkeye said with a grin.

“Pierce,” the colonel scolded.

“What? I can’t have any fun?” Hawkeye mock grumbled as he got to work. He pulled off the dressing and immediately ran into a bleeder. “Clamp,” he ordered. A nurse dropped one into his hand. He used it to clamp the bleeder and then got to work with his tools to extract the metal that had caused it.

There were five gurneys in OR in a row. The colonel held the one by the admission door. Hawkeye had the second in line, Major Burns the next in line, then Captain Chuck Jones, and finally Captain McIntyre. They were all at work.

As soon as his patient was cleared, Hawkeye took a step back, flicked his gloves off with practiced ease and then checked on the other surgeon’s work as orderlies pulled his patient and two new orderlies carried in the next in line. Hawkeye gave a few tips to Fred Burns, but the major snarled to leave him alone.

“He’s the head surgeon, Fred. Behave,” the colonel said in exasperation as Hawkeye ignored the snarl and went on to Chuck. He assisted with a tear in the abdominal wall, which uncovered fragments of metal in the patient’s intestinal track. “You’ll have to go through him centimeter by centimeter looking for holes,” Hawkeye warned.

“Just pull the metal out and move on,’ Major Burns said as he threw some metal into a bin.

“If you don’t patch the intestines, the patient’s guts will dump into the abdominal cavity, which you should know, Fred,” Hawkeye said testily.

“He’s right,” McIntyre growled. “We’ve had to reopen a dozen of your patients in the past month to fix those mistakes,” he stated.

“Do it right, Burns,” the colonel growled.

“Everyone’s ganging up on me,” the major pouted but kept working. “Give me a clamp, no the other one. Can’t you do anything right, nurse?” he demanded, taking his ire out on the nurse.

Major Margie Holohan stepped in to relieve the nurse and assist the major. He knew better than to snap at her.

Hawkeye ran his hands and apron through the sterilizer field, put new gloves on and then turned to the next patient as he was settled in. “So, who is the next winner in the metal extraction club?” he quipped as the nurse came up with the x-rays once more.

*M*A*S*H*